Someone has very well said that "Change is the essence of human nature.". For last few months, I started thinking about "Insecurity" and how it has tied our lives and made our life insecure. I realize that I too living in various circles of insecurity - insecurity about my job, my career, my friends, my car, laptop and 'n' number of things.
Till few months back, my life was almost perfect. I was working tirelessly and a sense of strength was present in my working life. My closest buddy was also my team-mate in office that made my professional life much more easier. I had just found another good friend in the form of my car pool and she has been a real strength whenever I want to talk about something where I need the perspective of someone from the other gender.
When life was at its full swing, somekind of insecurity started creeping into my life. To overcome it, I started teaching my inner self that insecurity is unjustified and started talking about the same in front of my friends in a hope that I escape from this monster.
But Time is more powerful. The situation around me changed in the last few weeks. My closest buddy has just got a good job and moving out. He will no longer work with me after a week or so and now insecurity of working without him is making me weak. Some differences have emerged with my other friend on some personal issues and she and I are now behaving more formally than we should, though I feel that it is nothing but a temporary phase in our friendship. But still some sense of insecurity too has creeped in regarding her on whether my this formal behavior can actually ruin our othewise good friendship or we will back to our good self in the coming days. My job has not been as great which have made things much more difficult for me.
This entire turn of events has taught me a very good lesson which I would like to share. Life always test your beliefs and your attitude towards life. For ex., if a drunkard man decides to leave the liquor, the time will put him in front of pub or his circle of friends who drink with him several times to test whether his change in belief is really strong or not. Similarly, I think that time has put me into "Testing phase" and checking whether my change in belief of "leaving insecurity aside" has any substance in it or not.
The time is taking away everything around me that I rely upon to see whether I re-instill insecurity within me or not. Albeit, I hope that things will again turn on my side and I will be together once again with my friends or lead a great professional life. But before that, I need to be strong and patienty let the time play its role of a teacher perfectly.
We all might have played a role of a teacher or a mentor sometime, be it as small as teaching how to play cards or a game to our friends / family. If we closely introspect, how we do it???? We first teach the person how to play and then ask to play against us only just to see how much that person has learnt. I believe in a similar manner, the time instills a belief in us and then tests us whether we have learnt it properly or not. I am praying to god that indeed my belief in "leaving insecurity aside" will be tested successfully and I emerge out as much better person for myself and for my friends and family.
Jai Mata Di... Good Night!!!!
